How to live in the present without despair can sometimes become an arduous and complicated task. This is not surprising since you start to understand the language do not stop listening to phrases like “you have to think about your future” “you will spend all summer studying if you do not approve” “If you had thought before acting this would not have past “and a long etc …
And is that most of the time (all but one to be exact) we will not die tomorrow? Overcome depression by being more present.
How to be more present?
But the reality is that although you continually circulate on your Facebook wall self-help phrases such as “Live as if it were the last day of your life” this philosophy at a pragmatic level most of the time is unfeasible.
And although you can do millions of things to have a fuller and more exciting life, you should not forget that your present results from the decisions you made in your past and that the small/large actions you perform at each moment (+ some factors are not under your control) are what will determine your future.
Neither do you fall into the extreme of wanting to have it under control and wait for a retirement that may never come or an age that you may never reach to do what you really want to do with your life?
The present is a gift that you have in your power the future Who knows!
Live the moment favors survival
Did you know that children who get lost in the forest have a higher survival rate than adults?
This is because they drink water when they are thirsty, eat when they are hungry, take refuge when they are cold, flee when they are afraid and do not try to reach places that are beyond what their eyes allow them to see.
They play with what they have in the present and not with what they would like to have in the future.
Children are more concerned with the here and now than with what may happen next, that is why they laugh more, have more energy and generally behave in a more spontaneous and optimistic way.
This means that we are born knowing how to live the present moment perfectly, what happens is that little by little we unlearn how to do it and learning to wait …
Live the present moment vs wait
Expect to be happy when:
- Be more handsome, smarter, thinner
- Have more friends
- Get a better job
- Have a business that works
- Find a partner
- Have children
- Make that trip finally
Etc, etc, etc …
- Finish your work day
- Arrive on the weekend
- Have that appointment
- You go in Easter to a rural house
Or to what:
- Stop having anxiety
- You feel more motivated
- Be in a better mood
- The others behave better with you
And in this way your life is happening while you keep waiting because total “you will start tomorrow, or next week or next month”
I do not know about you, but I have many times “started tomorrow” to get up early, to stop eating so many sweets or to exercise.
It is a way that your mind has to deceive itself and to tell you calmly nothing happens because today does not do what you want to do, which is consistent with your values, you will have the opportunity to do it tomorrow.
That way you do not feel bad today
The problem is that tomorrow is always tomorrow and in this way, the day never comes when you finally take responsibility for your own life.
Keep waiting for the planets to align, the others change, get all your goals and have a wonderful life to finally be happy and enjoy your achievements. (Let me tell you from my own experience, that the feeling of happiness obtained by achieving a goal is not long lasting, so if you really believe that you will be happy for your whole life when you finally save enough money to move to the US, I’m sorry to tell you that you’re pretty confused).
Begin to enjoy today every moment that life gives you (even if it is not perfect, although it could be better, although things that you do not like are happening) for the simple reason that it is unique and unrepeatable. Start using the present for granite to granite enjoy the process of building a beautiful beach.
If you choose the first option, you can stop reading this article or file it to finish reading it “tomorrow”. If on the contrary, you want to learn how to live in the present moment, stay with me.
Live the moment without despair
Is there another way of living that is not from the present moment? Can we travel to the future and the past and I still have not realized?
While it is true that we can mentally project ourselves into the past and into the future, we can only do so to the extent that we are bringing these constructs to the present moment.
Emotions evoked by memories of the past or by projections to the future can only be felt here and now.
Because here and now, the present moment is the only real, the only thing that exists. If you have continued reading up to this point, it is because you want every second of your life to count and because you are interested in living in a more conscious way (with all the consequences) that this implies, so I will give you a series of guidelines that both me and Most of the people I have worked with are working to live the present moment in a more conscious way.
Do not let your expectations ruin your present
Expectations are the main enemies of the present. Since they are to tell you how things should be. And most of the time your expectations tell you that your life should differ from it is.
Expectations: “You should earn more money” “You would have to get up early” “Your boyfriend would have to give you more flowers and ask you more often how you’ve spent the day” “You should stop eating chocolate cookies” “You should become a vegetarian” “You should be more cheerful” “That person should pay more attention to you” “You should not feel so insecure” “You should be able to afford that house” “You should go to the gym more often”
They are that internal voice that shows the great difference between your ideal life and your current life, taking charge of filling your present with discomfort and frustration.
But the reality is that things are the way they are, and this does not always correspond with how you would like them to be.